Wow, so my last post was in the beginning of January. So much for keeping up with this blog huh? Haha. Blogging and journaling aren't my strongest area obviously. I think though, I put too much pressure on myself to make meaningful, interesting posts and that's what makes me stop. I think, well who is going to even read this and find it inspiring? I really should just be writing for myself, and if others want to join in then they are more than welcomed. This year so far has been an amazing one, and somehow there's only a few more months left already. Time really flies as you get older and I'm always just trying to hold onto it all. I'm afraid of losing my past and I find myself worrying too much about the future and what it may hold.
I think from now on I'll just write when I feel like I need to put something down. Whether it's just something that happened that day or week, or if it's something I really want others to see. I don't want to be a person who is always trying to make things perfect for others. If I write from my heart and with pure intentions then the people will come on their own. The same goes from my Youtube channel. I worry so much about what I post, is it good enough? Will it get views, comments, likes? I shouldn't live like that, it isn't the right way to go about things. Even now I'm just rambling but it feels good, it feels like me. These thoughts are coming from my own head and now they're down somewhere.
2018 so far has been full of a lot of personal growth. I started volunteering at a wolf sanctuary close by which is amazing. For anyone who might still be reading, I want to me a wolf biologist in the future. This opportunity to volunteer pretty much fell into my lap, so I think I should take that as a sign that I'm headed in the right direction. There may even be opportunity soon to start getting paid a small salary which is incredibly exciting. I've grown so attached to the pack, human and wolf. They're all so loving and have really helped me come out of my shell more. I get to meet people on a weekly basis, talk to them about wolves and answer their questions which I never thought I would be able to do. My name on here in the girl who is introverted, which still rings true. Many think that introverted just means shy, but that's not quite right. I can talk to people, have a great time around them even. But it does drain me as I have to sometimes put a lot more effort into it and once I get home I'm ready to crash as extroverted people gain energy from being around others.
Either way though it's been really good, even school isn't so bad. The one thing though that makes me upset is all the useless classes these colleges make you take that you won't have to use once you get to the field you're going for. When will I ever use Geometry and Trigonometry when I'm a wolf biologist? Probably never, and yet I have to waste my time doing them before I can move onto classes I actually want to take. To be honest, I wouldn't mind just working at the wolf sanctuary forever. That's really my end goal, is to have my own sanctuary and if I keep working there, who knows, I may one day own it. I'm getting ahead of myself though and I don't want to seem arrogant because there's plenty more qualified people out there to run it. I've just really found a place that feels like I belong and I get so excited thinking about it. Either way I think this is a long enough post for now, especially for just coming back many months later. It's been a good year so far and I'm excited to see what is to happen yet. If someone out there is reading this right now, thank you. I really appreciate it and I hope you're in a good place in your life right now or that you'll get there soon.
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